Making connections at Connections

It was a Saturday night and I figured instead of maintaining my normal ritual of singing loudly to Taylor Swift's "All Too Well", I would instead continue my deep and almost spiritual journey into the Perth gay-scene. So the night kicked off with an empty stomach and half a bottle of the cheapest Vodka I could find. It was still early but I had made plans to meet a friend at The Court.  Yes, it was time for round two of what is still a mysterious maze of smoke and mirrors but this time I was not so afraid.

A "Quick Fuck" (it's a shooter) to start with and an awkward wait on the side-lines, phone-in-hand waiting for my late friend.  He was a closeted Court virgin.  It was not until later that night that I had realised I've repeated the same mistake.  I am experiencing  something relatively new with someone as inexperienced as me!  But the night was young, the alcohol was seemingly cheap and I was ready to dance and so danced I did.  It's fair to say that my second visit to The Court was fun-filled and lively, as I was not afraid any more.  I am still yet to decide whether that is a result of my own personal growth or the amount of alcohol I had drank.  Something which I can only come to the conclusion of when I go out again.  A long island ice tea later and my mate and I were ready to experience something new.  It was time for what was later described to me as the "great migration".

I've finally left what can easily, to my surprise, be described as the 'innocent' side of gay clubbing and headed over to the deep, dark and seedy centre of Northbridge. Connections!  All I can say is thank god I was already drunk.  If being groped by strange old men is your thing I highly recommend this nightclub (be wary of the $20 entry fee).  Clubbing is about having fun, we do this through a variety of ways such as dancing, drinking, talking and yes, occasionally hooking up.  These things are done with our consent.  Now I am not blaming Connections Nightclub for the people who go there, the place is magnificent although pricey.  It has a fantastic view up stairs of the city, a small but fun dance floor and most importantly a DJ who played the dance re-mix to Frozen's "Let it Go".  

Despite these perks attending the nightclub raised new issues with me, my view of the gay scene and my acceptance of gay culture.  Do we consider ourselves or even others as 'sexual objects'? Do we comprehend the meaning of consent?  Many people would refer to Grindr or Hornet as examples of where gay men come together to objectify each other but again they do this with each others consent. Friends, family and strangers have said to me that 'gay men only think about sex', my own personal experience would suggest otherwise.  There is a split culture with those who respect people and those who merely objectify people.  So where do we draw the line and how do we unite?

Some may think that I am being dramatic over the repetitive and uncalled for groping that both myself and my friend received but it may be that dismissive nature that allows for more serious and immoral actions to take place.  If we let it slide in the Gay Community do we let it slide in the rest of society?  Is being touched without asking for it really a compliment? Should it make me or others feel "desirable"?  The answer is simply no!  I am sure people out there will disagree, I am sure many people love being groped by strangers while clubbing and that is perfectly fine.... for them.  If you want it and if you consent to it that's OK and it is your own business but if you're simply hanging around it is not an invitation to touch or be touched by others without their approval.  To me this is common sense and good manners.  People deserve to be treated with respect at all times.  Being drunk is no longer an excuse. 

Of course life does go on and I continued the night embracing a fun-loving party culture with my friends until my wallet ran dry. I had my first club hook-up.  I bumped into my friends Dylan and the ever-so-sassy Josh, who are two of the most sociable gays I have met so far.  So a question remains.  Did I have a good night?  The hangover the next morning and the cute boy by my side to me would suggest yes!  

We are individuals, not objects and for that we must be proud!

What appears to me my only photo of the night